Proud of my kids

Though the past three days has been incredibly stressful to me, I'm very impressed by my children. First I'll give a shout out to Blake who is growing up so quickly, potty training like a pro. Accidents are becoming very few and far between.
Peter and Andrew wanted to be a part of the Science Fair this year. It's very hard to help a kindergartner and a 2nd grader do a science project. I guess I could have made it easier by doing more myself, but I really tried hard to have my kids do as much as possible. As a result, Andrew's project was a complete failure. I was initially a bit disappointed, but then I thought, "Why does he have to have a successful science project?" The kid thought up something he was interested in (volcanoes and lava) and ended up with a question, a hypothesis, an idea to test it, and well, a lot of ingested chocolate. He wanted to explore why volcano rocks have holes. We talked about maybe since the lava cools so quickly, when gas bubbles pop it'll cool before it fills in the gap. So he thought of something similar to lava- chocolate. We melted it then poured it into three cups. One went in the fridge, one in the freezer, and one on the counter. We ended up with no bubbles. So we talked about how the cooling may have a lot to do with the lava rock holes but that chocolate doesn't have gas like lava does. We tried blowing bubbles into the melted chocolate before cooling, but still no bubbles. Oh well. He learned a lot about lava and lava rock and also, more importantly, learned that it's a good thing to always ask questions.
Peter studied static electricity. He found an experiment online and pretty much used that. But it was just really good practice to try to critically think not just about what was happening but why it was happening and how it matters. He also got to cut up a box, which is one of his favorite things to do.
I am so proud that my kids were so excited to be little scientists. I'm proud of their questioning skills. I'm happy that they put up with my stressful attitude by the end of tonight and ended their preparations being very pleased with their efforts.
Hooray for children.
Now I need a nap for the next twenty hours.

Lesson learned

Saturday afternoon I got a call from my old Bishop asking if I would be willing to sing Amazing Grace at a funeral today. I was excited to be able to say yes. I had never sung at a funeral before and was grateful to be asked. I found a beautiful version on Amazing Grace as done in the movie of the same title. It adds a chorus line which is very inspiring. After editing it down and switching out a stanza, working with my pianist Sunday, and my personal practicing (so glad I can play the piano and sing), I was feeling really good. I even was worrying a bit that the song would come off as showing off instead of being appropriate for the occasion. Yup, that confident.
And then the funeral began. I walked through the viewing right before. Peter was with me, home from school sick, and wanted to look. We then sat down and proceeded to listen to two beautiful speakers. I didn't know the old gentleman who had passed away. It was fun to smile with and laugh with these family members and friends as they reminisced over their loved one. After the eulogy finish, it was my turn. I decided to sing he first verse A Capella and was given the first note. I took a breath and began. I couldn't get past the words Amazing grace before I started getting choked up. I actually decided to pause for a second to compose myself before trudging forward. It didn't get much better. Looking out at all those people who I now felt connected to, feeling the spirit of love and unity, seeing the tears in their eyes- ah man. I was toast.
I really didn't think I would have that hard of a time singing at a funeral of someone I didn't know. But getting through that song was one of the most difficult things I have ever done (in the realm of singing). But boy did I learn my lesson quickly!
I got a lot of good feedback after the funeral. I even had one of the sons come up to me and tell me how much he appreciated my song and that he would always remember it. I wanted to apologize!
But I know, I know. I didn't sing off key. I didn't botch the words. I passed to those in the audience a feeling of love and tenderness, of grace and mercy. And those feelings of being overwhelmed were the exact feelings they were going through. Part of me wonders if it would have been as touching to them if I had sung flawlessly. Just part.
This was a good first-time experience for me. I either need to stand in the foyer until my turn next time, or just sing at enough funerals that I can better learn how to channel or control my emotions.
And in the end I feel what I said to this man's son. I was grateful to be able to share this important moment with them. So, thank you.

Happy New Year

Randall and I have been discussing why New Year is such a big deal. To me, New Years is similar to Easter. Easter is about rebirth, renewal. New Years has that same basic feel. Yes, Easter is much more than that, but just go with me on this one.
To me New Years is a second chance. Every night that you go to bed, especially if it's a hard day, you think, "There's always tomorrow." There is something about going to bed at night and waking up the next morning, giving yourself another chance at a better day.
A stronger sensation occurs on your birthday. That morning you awake officially another year older. It brings with it a feeling of starting again. You feel that change is possible.
In a world that is ever fluctuating, full of surprises, unknown, I feel it is a necessary human reaction to constantly need the feeling that you can start again. It's like repentance in action every day. We often have feelings of regret and disappointment. To handle that, we continually need to feel that those negative things do not continue to compound on one another. We can clear our plate, so to speak, and have courage in what has yet to come.
Then there is New Years. I think the beginning of the year brings these feelings more powerfully to mankind than any other celebration. It is a time of reflection. It is a time of remembrance. It is a time of regrets. Then it is a time of promise. A time of renewal, rebirth, re commitment. We can look in the mirror and say to ourselves with honesty, "I did these things right. I did these things wrong. This year I'm going to be better."
My New Years Resolutions this year are to 1. Attend the Temple regularly with my spouse. 2. Build my piano studio.
We have to be careful when we plan our resolutions. There are way more than two things I can work on! But I need to be realistic. I need to pick things that I am willing to work on.
And where there is a will, there is a way. But that way needs to be clear.
Too many times we make resolutions without a plan. For Family Home Evening we talked about how to obtain our goals. In order to reach a goal we need to make a plan. What things must be in place? Do we need outside help? Is there money involved? Etc etc. Then there needs to be mini-goals. I like to think of them as either stair steps or stepping stones. The only way to get to the end is to take each step along the way. So, what are those steps? You need to know them. An finally a goal takes time and patience. Most goals do not happen instantaneously. If your goal is to loose thirty pounds and tone up your muscles, you won't get there in a week. And that. is. okay.
This year I hope you all feel the power a new year can bring. I hope it feels you with hope, charity, compassion, and strength. You don't have to be perfect. You just need to keep trying. To give up on yourself is the greatest tragedy. So, take advantage and take the reins. Good luck with 2011. No matter what life brings, let's do our best.
One of my favorite scriptures. Jacob 6:12 O be ^awise; what can I say more?